There is an old saying: “Misery loves company.” In 2024 that old adage can be restructured to read, “Misery creates company.” There are a vast number of people in the world today who are addicted to misery. If you have pain and misery in your life, then you more than likely have plenty of friends.
Things have changed in the world. There used to be a time when people did not want to talk about their issues and misery with anyone they met. In 2024 you can’t avoid running into someone who wants to share their issues and misery. Don’t start a conversation with someone in public unless you want to share some misery. Simply being cordial and saying hello to someone standing in line to buy groceries can lead to a healthy dose of misery from the other person. The odd thing about this misery sharing phenomenon is people seem to get off on the misery they receive or share.
I had a female friend that the only way she could be convivial was if I made up some form of issue I was having. If I told this person I was having a great day and my life was going swimmingly, she would become distant. I learned a lot from this person. One major thing was I realized that I wasn’t a misery addict and to never again bring someone who was into my inner circle. This was years ago. In this new day it seems as if everyone is a misery addict and have no intentions of kicking the habit.
There are people who seem to be lazy or lackadaisical about life. These same people seem to be re-energized in conversation and physical interactions when you say you have a problem. It is as if these people are rejuvenated because they can bite off into your situation and gorge themselves on your misery. If you tell them the issue you are having is not a real issue and start laughing it off, they draw away from you. Why? You have teased them. You have played with their emotions. They wanted to feast on your misery and help you solve a dilemma as they planted seeds of more misery in your head.
You can spot the misery addict easily enough. This is the person who always has a down aura about themselves. This is a person who only seems to perk up or engage in conversation if they are talking about problems. The problem could be one of their own or something that is going on in their family. The days of keeping family issues inside the family are long gone like a pterodactyl. The misery addict uses any information, or problem that they can get their hands on, to share and make others miserable. Family secrecy means nothing to the misery addict. You tell the misery addict a problem and if you are lucky only their friends will know. If you are unlucky and the misery addict is a social media buff, well your business is global.
The misery addict often runs in packs. There are so many misery addicts that other misery addicts can be choosy with whose misery they choose to dine on. Walk into a bar, restaurant or any place where people gather to “have a good time.” You will see them nursing drinks or shoveling food into their mouths while sharing or absorbing misery. This is not a gender issue either. Both sexes have extremely high numbers of misery addicts. Race is also not an issue. You can get a misery addict in any shade, white, black, brown, tan, etc.
Misery is the new drug of choice and the misery fiends are countless. If you find yourself happy and alone, you may want to create some misery, and believe me, you will have some friends. The more misery you can put out, the more friends you will have. The main flaw to being a misery addict is that the misery addict doesn’t realize that they are creating their own misery.
Frank James IV © 2024
beingfrankwithfrank@gmail.com
The opinions expressed in this editorial are those of the writer and not of the Milwaukee Times Weekly Newspaper or HT Group, LLC, its staff or management. “Being Frank” is a bi-weekly column exclusive to the Milwaukee Times Weekly Newspaper.
