‘Tis the season again in the USA. Christmas is here. The shopping malls will stay open late as they attempt to lure people back into stores. People will flood the post office and other shipping carriers with packages to be delivered before December 25th. Many people will go out of their way to purchase items for loved ones to make them happy. There is one person everyone needs to look out for first. Everyone needs to make sure that they look out for themselves before anyone else.
I can hear people saying that the act of looking out for oneself is selfish. Many people will say that it is impossible for them to look out for themselves because they have responsibility to others. These previous statements sound good, but are they correct? How can it be selfish to look out for the one person that is with you at all times, yourself? How can you maintain any responsibilities for others if you don’t take care of yourself first? The so-called selfless act of putting others before yourself is why many people are miserable in their lives. It is the Christmas season. Open the gift of looking out for number one.
Selfishness is something that you can be accused of for almost anything. If you eat the entire sweet potato pie your mother made you are called selfish because no one else got a slice. That is a petty way to look at the concept of looking out for yourself I am talking about. I am talking about looking out for yourself as it pertains to mental health and growth as a person. A person who doesn’t have a stable mental image of themselves is more of a danger to others than an asset. How can a sick man help other sick people? This analogy applies to all levels of human existence. Too often people try to help others and ignore themselves and this leads to circumstances for the assisting person that are not pleasurable. Take the gift and look out for yourself first.
Any person who is truly a friend will understand the fact that you have to help yourself before you can help them. If I have financial responsibilities to a person, but am unemployed and broke, how can I do this? I can send a few pennies, but what if I looked out for myself. What if I understood that I can’t help this person at this stage? What if I left town to go to college or technical school? This act of looking out for myself increases my chances of being able to assist financially later, especially if I get fruitful employment as a result. I can now assist because I am in a better position to assist. Is this selfish?
Your family will always be your family no matter what. The biological ties that bind cannot be cut because you enjoy the gift of looking out for yourself. Many families are bogged down with issues that wear family members down. If I am worn down mentally with my own problems, how can I assist my cousin with theirs? It is not selfish to block a relative in order to get your household, mind and self in order. Yet, many people rush to assist relatives knowing that the act of involving themselves in the other’s issues will just add more burden to themselves. This act of “looking out” often doesn’t help the person you want to assist. The usual result is that now the helper has two sets of problems and no answers for the relative who they rushed to assist. The gift I am offering is priceless and free, people.
As you do your holiday shopping take time to look at yourself. Helping others is always a good thing. Remember, if you truly want to be effective in assisting other people, take care of yourself first. In the end, you are truly all you have. Happy Holidays!
Frank James IV © 2024
beingfrankwithfrank@gmail.com
The opinions expressed in this editorial are those of the writer and not of the Milwaukee Times Weekly Newspaper or HT Group, LLC, its staff or management. “Being Frank” is a bi-weekly column exclusive to the Milwaukee Times Weekly Newspaper.
